What Is “Ear Pleasure”? The Summer House Reunion Has Everyone Wondering

When someone whispers in your ear, does it tickle? Like... really tickle? Does ASMR flood your senses? Does a nip on the earlobe from your partner really get you going? Turns out our ears can be an erogenous zone, and ear pleasure is a certified thing.

If you watched the first part of the Summer House reunion that aired last week, you know why ear play is making headlines. If not, here’s the gist: Host Andy Cohen asked if West Wilson and Ciara Miller had hooked up after their breakup. Wilson’s response was, “It was, like, ear stuff.” Fellow cast member Lindsay Hubbard spoke for many viewers when she asked, “What the f*ck is ear stuff?”

Ear stuff, ear play, or ear pleasure — whatever you call it, it’s a pretty low-stakes, playful idea to incorporate into your intimacy, compared to some other trending sex ideas (see: castlecore sex). Here’s everything you need to know, if you’re new to the idea.

What is “ear pleasure?”

Ear play refers to sensual or sexual stimulation of the ears, according to Angie Rowntree, ABS, founder and director of Sssh.com, an online destination for sex-positive, ethical porn.

“The ears are already a well-recognized erogenous zone, but partly thanks to the Summer House reunion make-out session, ear play is having a moment,” she says. “However, on Sssh.com, we’ve had members asking us for ear-related content since the very beginning. Ear play also shows up naturally in many Sssh.com films, often as part of foreplay or during intimate scenes, because it’s such a popular and naturally sensual form of touch.”

It’s true: The outer ear is densely populated with nerves, making it one of the most sensitive areas of the body, according to the NIH. As a result of all that ability to feel, adding ear stuff to foreplay can feel “intense, intimate, and vulnerable,” with some people even claiming to have “eargasms” because their ears are so responsive.

“The outer ear has highly sensitive skin, while the inner ear contains thousands of nerve endings that process sound and vibrations. Our body’s own wiring means that your ears can translate gentle touch, breath, or sound into tingly, arousing sensations that spread through the body. ASMR anyone?” Rowntree says.

How To Try Ear Pleasure & See If It’s For You

Everyone’s erogenous zones are different, with some being more sensitive than others. If you and your partner are both on board with trying ear stuff, here are some ideas you can start with straight from Rowntree:

• Lightly kiss or suck the earlobe
• Nibble or gently bite (very softly — you don’t want to get too intense on sensitive cartilage)
• Lick or trace the outer ear with your tongue
• Whisper dirty talk, compliments, or moans directly into the ear
• Blow or breathe warmly on the outer edge of your ear (for safety reasons, do not blow inside the ear canal)
• Use fingers to caress behind the ear or massage the lobe
• Combine ear play with scalp scratches or neck kisses for a full ASMR-like sensory experience

“It also helps if you build anticipation, too. You might want to start with your neck, then move to the jaw, then the ear,” she adds.

(And one important note: You should never insert anything into your ear canal!)

Ultimately, Rowntree says anytime conversations like this happen following a pop culture moment, it’s good for overall sex positivity. “Even if you decide ear play isn’t for you, knowing it can be a thing for some people reminds us that pleasure is deeply personal. Further, if you’ve never tried it and feel curious, the zeitgeist is sometimes, for better or worse, where people look for ‘permission’ to try it, or to validate their desire in the first place,” she says.

So, if West Wilson said “ear stuff” and you thought “say more about that,” maybe it’s worth a try in your own bedroom.